Hi there, I recognise a few users on here already 
My OH and I have been together 5.5 years. Things have been tough at some points but I do feel we have entered a new era now with the EFH. She has caused a lot of trouble before for me. I am the younger woman that her ex husband ended up with and when we got together their divorce was still being finalised because finances could not be agreed. So that was a really hellish time.
I have two SSs who are 13 and 16 and no children of my own. My ESS has just finished his GCSEs and will be going to college in September. The SSs stay with us Friday night to Sunday afternoon every other weekend and then most half terms they are here at least half the time. Luckily OH and EFH are mostly on the same page and dates are agreed quite reasonably. My OH works from him so they tend to be with us more in the holidays and we live about an hour away from them so it’s easier when they are here longer.
Now that OH’s divorce has been final since 2021 things are much better. We have not had any run ins with EFH at all really. I do not see her at all.
She continues to claim online that OH was an emotionally abusive narcissist during their marriage - I simply can’t believe it. He’s not perfect, but he’s not a mean or selfish person. He’s not confrontational which can be frustrating for me, he bottles things up and sometimes he doesn’t deal with problems rationally but he’s not a narcissist. The irony is that EFH is very much like a narcissist!!
My relationship with the SSs has been hard work, they are shy and withdrawn. Partly because I met them when they were pre teens and becoming moody. Partly because it has been awkward between us all from the get go. And partly because at home EFH does not teach them how to speak to adults and allows them to be moody, rude and stay in their rooms on screens as much as they like. I’ve learned not to take it personally as they are the same way with OH’s mother and brother.
My relationship with them has developed and got to a better place. Particularly with YSS, although he can be quieter he has a lovely nature and is more open to building a friendship. ESS can be very moody, but he has his good moments and I do think we have gotten somewhere. ESS definitely felt split loyalty between our households and I’m sure felt like he should protect his mothers feelings.
My OH’s mother is rather difficult. So far I have no outward issues with her and we get along and she rather likes me. But her behaviour and the way she treats my OH can drive me up the wall - particularly lately it’s quite bad.
Anyway that’s me in summary.
Since the divorce I feel that mine and OH’s relationship has gone from strength to strength, the stress and pressure was really affecting the relationship and things have been good and settled for a while now.
My OH and I have been together 5.5 years. Things have been tough at some points but I do feel we have entered a new era now with the EFH. She has caused a lot of trouble before for me. I am the younger woman that her ex husband ended up with and when we got together their divorce was still being finalised because finances could not be agreed. So that was a really hellish time.
I have two SSs who are 13 and 16 and no children of my own. My ESS has just finished his GCSEs and will be going to college in September. The SSs stay with us Friday night to Sunday afternoon every other weekend and then most half terms they are here at least half the time. Luckily OH and EFH are mostly on the same page and dates are agreed quite reasonably. My OH works from him so they tend to be with us more in the holidays and we live about an hour away from them so it’s easier when they are here longer.
Now that OH’s divorce has been final since 2021 things are much better. We have not had any run ins with EFH at all really. I do not see her at all.
She continues to claim online that OH was an emotionally abusive narcissist during their marriage - I simply can’t believe it. He’s not perfect, but he’s not a mean or selfish person. He’s not confrontational which can be frustrating for me, he bottles things up and sometimes he doesn’t deal with problems rationally but he’s not a narcissist. The irony is that EFH is very much like a narcissist!!
My relationship with the SSs has been hard work, they are shy and withdrawn. Partly because I met them when they were pre teens and becoming moody. Partly because it has been awkward between us all from the get go. And partly because at home EFH does not teach them how to speak to adults and allows them to be moody, rude and stay in their rooms on screens as much as they like. I’ve learned not to take it personally as they are the same way with OH’s mother and brother.
My relationship with them has developed and got to a better place. Particularly with YSS, although he can be quieter he has a lovely nature and is more open to building a friendship. ESS can be very moody, but he has his good moments and I do think we have gotten somewhere. ESS definitely felt split loyalty between our households and I’m sure felt like he should protect his mothers feelings.
My OH’s mother is rather difficult. So far I have no outward issues with her and we get along and she rather likes me. But her behaviour and the way she treats my OH can drive me up the wall - particularly lately it’s quite bad.
Anyway that’s me in summary.
Since the divorce I feel that mine and OH’s relationship has gone from strength to strength, the stress and pressure was really affecting the relationship and things have been good and settled for a while now.
